Is it normal to abstain from sex because of the fear of contracting?
Im going to tell you an embarrassing secret. When I was 7, I told my mom I wanted to die by the time I was 17. My mom - once she quit laughing - asked me why, and I told her there were three reasons: So Id never have to kiss anyone. Who wanted to swap spit? That just sounded gross to me. So Id never have to get my wisdom teeth pulled. That just sounded like hell on earth - a visit to the dentist (my most hated adversary ever) that guaranteed pain? No thank you!!! So Id never have to have sex. Now, not only would I have to exchange gross bodily fluids, but there would most likely be pain involved as well? That just sounded wrong. Im now 44 and obviously I didnt die at 17. Kissing turned out to be a ton more fun than Id guessed. Having my wisdom teeth pulled wasnt great, but I did enjoy the drugs. And sex? Well, I actually waited longer than any of my friends (I waited until I was 21). It was anticlimactic (pun intended) when I finally had it. Look, STDs are no joke. Its good that youre aware and concerned. But first, you should be wearing a condom no matter what anyway - for your own protection against becoming a baby daddy (if youre with a girl - no judgment) - and thats going to knock out half the STDs out there. Next, dont have sex with strangers, and have the conversation. Yes, some people will lie, but the majority of them out there are not infected with anything, and those that are, wont be up for sex in the middle of an outbreak anyway. Have the conversation, use a condom, and eventually youll get over your fear. What youre going through isnt abnormal. Sex is sweaty (when done right) and there are a lot of fluids being exchanged. When you really think about it, it is kind of gross. But when you eventually meet the right person, those thoughts will be the last thing on your mind. So I wouldnt worry about whether youre acting normal or not, Id consider the fact that you just havent met the right person yet. Good luck and have fun when you do!